ever after

"I have to be careful while getting off from the car" i had told myself. The saree is heavy and never in my life before i wore so many jewelleries. And yes, the makeup. And oh yes! the maroon lipstick. Well, i guess every girl has to do this at least once in her life. Like me. On the day of the wedding.
While passing by the mandap i noticed the white satin sheet on the dias looked very sad. I shouted, as if im on a film set, "Spot dada"!!! No. I screamed out to my brother and said, ask them to put some rose petals on the dias. It will look good.
Mom quickly said, "dont bother now, You be quiet. You are the bride".
I realised i have to be poised and all that. Like a shy, sober bride.
Had seen my groom from the window while he was passing by the corridor to fix his dhuti.
And my aunt said, "dont look! you are not supposed to see him before the wedding happens."
I waited patiently till i was called. In fact i was faffing with my friends.
I had to cover my face with a betel leaf and took 7 circles around the groom.
Then the eyes met, the smiles came, the garlands were exchanged and the sindoor was neatly sitting on my forehead.
The game was fun.
"And they lived happily ever after."

and here i am...

As long as the auto kept on standing in the traffic, I kept on looking at her.
She never for even once did look at me.
Is she aware that I am staring at her? No she isn't.
She kept looking at one direction, as if she was waiting for someone… or may be something. Far away… just so far away from the sabzi mandi… 4 bungalow signals, beyond andheri…Mumbai, this country... beyond this life…
Her face had many lines of worry, her eyes were little sad and tired. Once the auto moved a little ahead, she changed the direction and with the same expression started looking at another direction… far away…
I was trying to figure out why am I glued to this face… what is that I am so intrigued about? That face had worry, weariness, wait and this entire thing put together turned into an unavoidable habit with each passing day.
She is just over and done with whatever has been going on around her. And gotten used to even that. So there she was. My 52 year old muse...
Another emotion it had… I searched looking for that word… that’s so dramatically similar to my state of mind…

Indifference.

These days someone sitting in the other room turns into a stranger…